We Are The God Participants and We Carry the Dream. . . .
My stamina is low or nil. I think I can do something because my head envisions, but my body does not follow. I spend time now waiting for this national nightmare to end and find others adding to the nightmare. I had such good hope for our officials and find that they are less, less than what they portrayed.
I seem to be not a good judge of character in this life. What should be ethical and lawful behavior is not the official frame of reference.
Am I gullible and naïve and unrealistic as to what keeps this world turning? Hopelessly out of step as I was called? But I still hold that what I consider good and ethical behavior on my part is what I expect of others also.
Is it so out of thought in this day? When it makes my mouth gape open stupidly and I am without words, does it show ignorance or shock at what I view?
Whose world is it I mirror? What do I hold highest and best and ethical? Am I so out of step? Yet because I frame the question, I know the answer. And I am in shock. I cannot believe what my eyes are seeing and what I am hearing. Do you not see it also? I ask you, do you not hear it also?
Why is it I cringe with open mouth? Why am I aghast? I am almost a hundred years old minus a bit over a decade. Yet appalled and embarrassed because I see a lack of character and cannot see a future for my progeny without a country whose constructs are honesty, courage, truth with love for its genesis that conceived its birth. Do I not speak clearly?
It goes against who I am born into this life with a head that had memory of some places elsewhere. And yet knowing this country would be a paradise for me because nowhere was there such a place of lush growth, evergreens and roses, and such high hopes with my word being my truth, my honor and my bond.
Yet watching what goes on within my government and listening to officials answering questions with whatever is convenient in the moment, makes me see once again my Mentor sparking blue with anger and turning over the money tables shouting Liars, ye are all Liars!
What happened to the dream? This has been such a hard time. That I am disheartened would be a mild statement. When I know we are the god participants of this Earth and the reason it either works or does not. And we might be the reason it goes down the tube again.
What do I want to hear? I am not sure I am equal to anything at the moment. Not sure at all.