In Conference. . . .with the Sages.  . .

From a journal entry of January 1993 where I had been in the midst of researching Jesus . .the teacher asked me to put my thoughts down. . . (It was a stressful time in our lives.  I wrote the following)

Jesus took on a monumental task.  From a god who was seen as unmerciful, all attributes people found in themselves,   Jesus translated this new spirit, this universal nimbus of benevolence, maybe benign, into a god of magnificent parental concern and love which took a great deal of courage.

The god of the people at the time was what they were, mean and unmerciful, jealous, vengeful while the god of Jesus was exactly what  man   could become.  Kind, thoughtful, loving,   qualities still to be uncovered within the human heart.

The original premise at the time was not what we consider mankind today, in a majority of cases.  It has been a matter of example, of education, a primer on earth or elsewhere in thought.  And that goes in the face of all men are created equal.

That also puts one squarely to think how many lifetimes to get to the place where love for one’s own begins to show.

The Jesus of the New Testament took upon himself or contracted with full knowledge, to change concepts.  Would we have had fewer religious wars if he had been revered with no argument?  Considering the times and the Romans?

The testimony was enough to stand on its own.  It was a philosophy of merit but also logic.  I say that even when heads of religions have argued the point.

I was told I was crazy and who did I think I was when I grappled aloud questions like these.  Better heads than yours was argued  and are paid big dollars.  Obviously, yet we fight wars and kill and wound and maim and rape.

So where are the better heads?  I have grappled with the nitty gritties of caregiving  and even sweated  in the sun at hard jobs while I worked just as hard with these questions.  I hear. . . you know when you hold a hot wire. . . .and was asked to explain my ‘nimbus’. . .

(I see it not as a cloud or halo  but an essence.  Something circling and permeating at the same time from which all manner of things are evident.  A touching, a hearing, a tasting of ultimate knowledge.  It changes as I change. 

Today I am the ultimate knowledge of who I am this minute, this fraction of a second but in the next concern I am another ultimate. 

The ultimate god would be the sum total of knowledge held, plus all the equations coming from that knowledge that would blend, qualify and direct toward a becoming of something different.

God is change.  From where did Jesus come where this knowledge was evident?  And from where did I come to think this and participate in life to chafe as I do?)

The Teacher said and I scribed the following: [ You ask the questions you do and the answers come when the footwork is done. The first premise ever put forth was that by the time the question is asked the answer already is known.  Else how to form the question?]